Friday, April 7, 2017

March 2016 Update - When “When” Becomes “If”

It’s hard when you’re making all of your plans because you’re sure of what’s going to happen. You’re able to turn to your husband and say “when we get to the Ranch, we’re going to…” and “when we’re raising support to go to the Ranch, we’ll need to…” But when all of that changes and everything is up in the air, it’s hard. It becomes “if we go to the Ranch, then we can…” and “if we don’t go to the Ranch, then I guess we’ll have to…”

At the beginning of March, there were two groups that came to serve at the Ranch back to back. I had originally agreed to return to during that time to help with the groups, but then something happened… Olivia, the kitten I’ve been raising since she was just 10 days old and needed to be dropper-fed with goat’s milk every 3-4 hours, wasn’t able to walk or even stand.

Long story short, she had a calcium deficiency that had led to weakness in her bones and so she started limping badly on one back leg after I tossed her from the bed (she was out of control biting, and that was far from the first or last time she’s been tossed from a bed), but then did something to her other back leg and couldn’t stand at all.

This happened 2 days before I was supposed to leave to help with the teams, and right after I had packed all my things in preparation to leave. Because I knew I wasn’t necessarily NEEDed at the Ranch like I was to take care of my cat who now needed to be propped up to even use the bathroom (which nobody here could easily do since they’re used to big dogs, not delicate kittens), I asked to be released from my verbal agreement to go.

That led to a lot of frustration on both sides. They at the Ranch felt like I was once again breaking my agreement with them, and I felt like they weren’t being very fair when I was just as frustrated about not being able to come, but wasn’t willing to risk Olivia’s life to do something that I knew could happen without me. After several more conversations, everything has been left up in the air.

Roberto and I both know that we want to go to the Ranch to serve. But, we don’t know if we will be allowed to serve there and if we are, when we would be able to go. It may be this summer or it may not be until fall. If it happens at all.

It’s in God’s hands now, and He knows what’s best for us.

So now we’re just waiting, which is really hard for me. I like to be able to be planning for the future, so not knowing what the future holds makes that impossible. If we are going to the Ranch, then I want to be planning Bible studies and start connecting with people and churches to visit during our furlough. But if we’re not, then I want to be planning for living here in Nicaragua, and possibly going with one of the other ministry ideas that’s been forming in my head.

Please be praying for us during this difficult time! Pray that God opens the doors for us to go to the Ranch if that truly is His will for us, or that He will make it abundantly clear if we’re not meant to go there. And if He does have other plans for us, pray that He opens new doors to let us pursue other ministry opportunities.

To my supporters: Your support is SO appreciated, and I want to assure you that I’m not using any of it while living here in Nicaragua. Roberto and I are currently supporting ourselves from what he’s earning and are waiting for God’s direction before using any ministry funds. I will keep you updated on finances as we learn more about what God has for us in the future!

P.S. Olivia is now back to her normal crazy self!

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